From the (Semi) Complete Works of William Soames Walthrop...

PG13
Archived at the Buffy Rebecca verse, www.geocities.com/buffyrebecca...

Disclaimer: All BTVS characters remain property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and all other owner/creators of the Buffy the Vampire Slayer series...

Summary: Poems, Essays from the works of William Soames Walthrop, aka Spike...in the Buffy Rebecca verse...

Additional contributions to the recovery of the lost works of England's third worst poet are always welcome...


Book the Second...


William Walthrop’s Christmas Carol...

Playmain theme...


Angelis was dead...To begin with...

You must believe that Angelis was dead or there can be nothing wonderful in the story I am about to relate...
***

“Now don’t forget, Spike...” Xander told him as he, Anya, and Dawn walked him back to his crypt...Christmas Eve...

“We’ll be picking you up for Christmas dinner at noon...And expect your best behavior...”

You can help me string popcorn garlands for the tree, Spike...Dawn told him happily...

Now that you’re our good friend and all...A noble, reformed vampire...she noted...Who did so much to help my sis with Glory and all...

And protected me all summer...

And possible candidate to be my sis’ beau...Someday...When she makes up her mind about you...

“Right...” Spike sighed...

Spike?...Dawn frowned...

Not regressing on us, are you?...You know how disappointed we’d be if you regressed...she noted...

And sis’d be on your tail in a hot minute...With Mr. Pointy at the ready...

“No, no...” he smiled... “Can’t wait for tomorrow...Grateful for the kindness and all that...”

Good...Dawn kissed him on the forehead...Xander shook hands...

“Buffy will be Patrolling tonight, right?...” he asked...

She hasn’t been by in a week...he noted...

Ever since old Soldier-boy sent her that letter from Central America...

“Not that I’d give her any trouble about that...” he assured Dawn...Who looked carefully at him...

Later on...Dawn noted...You can keep her company...

Oh...Great...he noted...

They wished him a merry Christmas and left him...

Geesch...he thought...They could have let me stay around until Buf got home from college...

After all it’s Christmas Eve...And night-time...

And here I am...Alone again in the crypt...Might as well not even be reformed for all the change it’s made...

What a life...Dancing on the Slayer’s leash...he thought...

Still...It is Buffy’s leash...

***

He turned on the telly...

“Can’t anyone tell me what Christmas is all about?...” Charlie Brown cried...

“Sure, Charlie Brown...” Linus told him... “I can tell you what Christmas is all about...”

“Lights, please...”

“Hi there, Spike...” Angelis’ head appeared on the telly screen...Smiling coldly...
Spike jumped...

Whoa...

It had vanished and Linus was back...

Dream...Just a dream, passed out for a sec...

Probably that chicken Dawn cooked tonight...Should never eat Dawn’s cooking before having a bag of blood...he noted...

Hmmn...Might as well catch a few night winks until Buf comes for Patrol...

If she comes...

He got up and paused by a plaque dedicated to some long-forgotten member of a long-defunct family...

Hmmn...Strange...

Could swear I heard something from inside there...

Like someone banging on a coffin...

He turned...And jumped...

Angelis...And definitely Angelis, not Angel, he somehow knew...

Sitting in his favorite chair...A gift from Dawn...

“Grandson...” Angelis nodded...

Spike tried to touch him and the hand went through...

“Ow!!!...Watch that, boy!...” Angelis glared at him...

Hurts if you’re not ready for it...he noted...

“Angelis?...It is you, isn’t it?...”

“No, it’s Barnabas Collins...you dolt...Of course it’s me, you worthless reanimated poet...”

Or should I say...Buffy Summers’ reanimated whipping boy...You disgrace to the vampiral race, you...

I’ve been watching you...From limbo...For quite a while...And I’ve come to help you...

“Very kind of you...Knew there must have been some good in you, Angelis...You’re Angel’s counterpart after all...” Spike noted...

Look, boy...If you’re gonna insult me...Angelis frowned...

I am your grandsire, after all...

Sorry, granddad...Go on...

“It’s at this time of year I suffer most of all...” Angelis whined...Hanukkah, Ramadan, Christmas, now this dratted Kwanza too...

“Humanity desperately trying to make the world a better place...Struggling to treat their fellow creatures with a modicum of kindness and sympathy...”

“When I think of the evil I could be doing right now...Murdering children in their beds...Leaving beloved relatives under the tree...In transformed state, even...Filling stockings with vital organs...”

Hmmn...Dru’d love that...Spike noted...

“But I had to waste my one precious chance to return on that fool Slayer and her friends...”

He always did blame the victim...Whining twit...Spike thought...

But you grandson...Have a chance to avoid my fate...

God knows I’d never waste months slowly building up to killing Giles’ girlfriend...Spike thought...And some girl Buffy barely knew...

“You will be visited...By three demons...” Angelis noted...

“Don’t tell me...It’s gotta be either Moe, Larry, and Curly or Warren, Andrew, and Jonathan...”

“Maybe some other time...” Spike told him politely...

Angelis frowned...

“Without their help, you cannot hope to shun the path that morosely brooding soulful counterpart of mine treads...”

Hmmn...Food for thought there, Spike noted...

“Expect the first...When your alarm rings at one...”

One?...AM?...

“The second at two...”

“And the third...Whenever it feels like coming...” Angelis grinned...

Great...So much for Christmas Eve patrol with my Slayer...Spike thought...

When she’s sure to be in...A sympathetic and kindly mood...

Thanks, granddad...Spike glared...

“Don’t mention it...” Angelis sneered...

Spike looked at him...

“So...Aren’t you leaving?...”

When I damn well feel like it...Angelis told him, leaning back in the chair...

I don’t get to project out of limbo very often, you know...

Boring place, limbo...he began...

“Well...It was nice seeing you again, grand-dad...” Spike noted, whipping a stake into Angelis’ chest...Which passed harmlessly through to the chair cushion...

Angelis glared at him...I’m an astral projection, moron, not a vampire...

“Do you think I’d waste a minute with you if I had regained my old form?...”

As I was saying...Limbo’s a boring kind of place, boy...Nothing to do, empty whiteness...Lots of whining human souls in horror over what their demon counterparts are doing...

Which does relieve the tedium for a little while, but then it just grates on the nerves...

By the way, Dru’s human soul sends her best...Sorry she couldn’t stop her demon back then...

Boring girl, really...Always praying for my soul, her soul, your soul, everybody’s soul...

And still the same trusting idiot...Believes me every time I tell her I want her prayers for my redemption...

Our Dru’s a distinct improvement...
***

After two hours Angelis finally had to fade out back to limbo...
***
Hmmn...Spike thought...So what the hell is ole grand-dad up to?...

No doubt he’d like to screw up my reformation...And keep me out of Buffy’s panties...

The alarm went off...

What the...Can’t be one yet...

A disembodied chuckle...

Dear ole grand-dad...he glared...

The first demon appeared...

***

The Master...

“Heinrich?...What the hell are you doing here?...” Spike looked at him...

You work for Angelis now?...he grinned...

We’re suddenly on a first name basis?...the Master glared...

“I don’t “work” for Angelis...I’m his partner...”

Heinrich!...A disembodied holler...

All right, all right...I was demoted after my little failure at the Hellgate...the Master admitted...

One little slip-up...And they never forget...

Well, after all, Angelis was never beaten in a fair fight with Buffy...Spike noted...Whereas you...

“At least I never ended up boot-licking Buffy Summers...” the Master glared...

Gentlemen...You haven’t got all night, you know...Again the disembodied voice...

“All right, all right...Well...” the Master sighed... “I’m here to remind you what a truly magnificent killer you once were...And how free your old life was...”
Let me show you...

Let me save you the trouble...Spike interrupted...

But...

“Yeah, yeah...I get it...Dru and me and the mass killings, etc...Yeah it was great, but I’m past all that now...Besides it was getting dull...” Spike noted...

And I’ve no interest in spending an hour reliving it with the likes of you...he went on...

But...

“Heinrich...You’re fired...” the disembodied voice called...

The Master vanished...The alarm rang again...

Two o’clock...
Say...where is Buf, anyway?...Spike wondered...

Course ole grand-dad is probably messing with time...Or at least with my alarm clock...

“Hi, Spike...” Buffy?...said...A rather vicious grin on her face...

Buffy?...Spike looked at her...Kind of scruffy-slut look for Christmas Eve, isn’t it?...

Hmmn-hmmn, it’s me...she nodded...

“Lets go Patrol...”

Wait a minute...Where did you come from?...

“I just came in...You must have been...Sleeping...” she noted brightly...But still with the vicious grin...

Uh-uh...Right...

Oh well, lets go...Spike told her...

***
They were at the Summers’...

Sounds of mourning from within...Garlic garlands all over the windows...

“Go on in, Spike...” Buffy grinned at him...
He looked at her and started in...Whang...Barrier?...

Wait a mo...Willow cleared things for me last summer...

Buffy giggled...

“Things are different now...” she laughed...

But come on...I can get us in...

***

“Willow...” she called from the front yard...

“Wil...low...”

A clearly enthralled Willow peered at an upstairs window...

And opened the window...

“Mistress...” she called softly...

Take me...Now...

“Well...Come on and open the back door, you idiot...” Buffy told her...

You expect us to climb up there?...

“You aren’t the Buffy I knew, are you?...” Spike looked at her...

“I’m the Buffy you would have transformed, darling...If you hadn’t lost your edge...”
she smiled at him...

Willow opened the door to them...

“Take me...Now?...” she begged Buffy the Vampire...

Later...Things to do, people to see...Buffy told her...

But...

“Go turn Tara into a rat or something...” Buffy commanded...

Come on...she told Spike...

Why not?...he threw up his hands and followed...

Though frankly, grand-dad...If this Buffy is supposed to win me back over to the dark
side, she might try being a little less skanky...

***

Buffy dead a week...At the hands of her greatest nemesis, William the Bloody...a sad-faced Giles sighed to Xander...And now, this...

Hmmn...”Greatest Nemesis?”...Spike thought, happily...

Still...He looked at Buffy the Vampire...Not a great improvement, I must say...

“Say...Can’t they see us?...” he asked

After all, Willow did...

Nope...Buffy told him...We’re shadows here...

But...

Oh...Angelis just wanted to mess with your mind back there...That was him doing the Willow...

“Is there anything we can do for her, Giles?...” Xander asked...

Only watch...And hope...Giles noted...

Her Key lifeforce is very strong...Perhaps...She’ll survive somehow because of it...

“Dawny?...” Spike looked at Buffy...

She grinned and nodded...

You?...he looked at her...

Moi...she smiled...

But she’s still fighting...he noted...

“Only prolonging the agony for them...” Buffy grinned...

She’ll be dead in a few days...Then with us...

But come and see what a wonderful world we’ve made...Or would...Together...she told him...
***

Sunnydale...A devastated wasteland...

Even for vamps and demons, actually...Spike noted...

Overpopulated with them...And the human populace down to a few hundred...

Naturally the supernaturals much too dim to consider moving to other locales...

Fatally attracted to the Hellmouth’s energy...And with so few humans left, fighting savagely amongst themselves...

But Buffy the Vampire seemed pleased...And delighted in showing him the misery the town had been reduced to...

Not really making a strong case, here, grand-dad...Spike noted...

“And here’s what would be...Our Palace...” Buffy told him happily...

Large as Dracula’s...she noted...

Hmmn...A ruined old mansion...Decrepit and rat-infested...Lovely...

At least Dracula had had some style...A castle in good repair, with all the modern conveniences...

“Can’t you see how wonderful it would be, Spike?...” she asked...

And you’d have me...She put on her demon face...

Ummn...he looked at the hideous face...

“What?...” she looked at him...And reverted...

“I always wear my true face when we have sex, Spike...What’s the matter?...”

A disembodied sigh...

This had seemed like such a good idea when the Wolfram-Hart people suggested it to him, Angelis noted to himself...

***

The alarm rang...Spike looked up from his slab...

2:45...Well, the last session had clearly not been working out...

“Hello...” A small, slight, bald man with a death’s head face leered at him...

Have I the pleasure of addressing William the Bloody?...

Spike sighed and nodded...

“I am Joseph...Of Wolfram-Hart, Inc...”

And I have come to show you the future you might have...If you fail to rejoin the side of darkness...

“Spike?!...” Buffy?...Was hollering from the stairs...

At a home?...Which he somehow knew was his and hers...

He saw himself...Decked out in tweeds, with glasses no less...

“Darling?...” his counterpart called up to Buffy...

Did you call the doctor?...she glared at him...

“Joycee’s fever is higher...”

“He said to bring her over if it stays above 101...Otherwise half a child’s aspirin...” his counterpart told her...

Dumb doctors...she noted...He should see her now...

“Well...Lets take her over then...”

They’ll just send us to the ER...she told him...

“You should’ve told him to take her now...” she went on...A tad accusing...

I’ll call him back, no problem...he replied...

She waved a hand...Oh, don’t bother yourself, she told him...

Wouldn’t want to have you spend a second away from your precious writing to care for your little daughter...

“She’ll be fine, Buffy...” he told her...

But I will call...Right now...he went on...And headed over to the phone...

I have a daughter...With Buffy?...Spike noted happily...

And...My God, it is...It’s daylight and the windows are open...

They’ve found some way to let me live in daylight...

“I thought you said he wouldn’t like this future...” Joseph groused to the disembodied Angelis...

Well...I knew I wouldn’t care for it...Angelis sheepishly admitted...

See...His disembodied voice went on...I’ve never really been all that close to Spike...

Honey...Buffy called...

“I’m sorry...You know...”

No problem...his counterpart called...

I should’ve pressed him in the first place...

Lets see another scene of the future...Joseph muttered grimly...

***
“So...It’s over...” A middle-aged Xander sadly noted to Anya....Likewise middle-aged...

I can’t believe it...Both of them gone...

“We always knew it might happen, honey...” Anya hugged him...

And they died together...It’s the way they’ve wanted to go...

“They should never have gone into this fight...They should have left it to the new Slayer...”
Xander noted angrily...On the edge of tears, clearly...

They never could accept the idea of getting too old to be the Slayer and her partner...Anya pointed out...

But thank God they weren’t transformed or cursed...And the fight was won...

Hmmn...Spike looked at them...So...

We’re dead...Buffy and I...

He looked at Joseph...Who grinned...

“Yes...Dead...No Immortality for you in this future, William...”

On Earth, you mean...Spike noted...

Well...Of...course...Joseph was hesitant...

Willow...A bit hefty and round-faced in her middle-age, knocked...Entered at Anya’s call...And rushed to embrace the now openly sobbing Xander...

“They’re together, Xander...I’m sure of it...In Heaven...”

Will’s redemption was a sure thing...she noted...

“How’s Dawny taking it?...” he looked at her, his tears having slowed a bit...

Bout what you’d expect...But she feels they did the right thing...

The new Slayer was inexperienced...If they hadn’t been there to help...

“And Joycee?..”

She’ll be angry for a while, I guess...

But in the end...she’ll understand...Willow noted...

“It’s poor Giles who’ll have the hardest time with this...” she told him...Wish we could’ve spared him this...

Maybe...Maybe if he knew they were together...Safe...Anya helpfully noted...

“A seance?...” Willow grinned wanly...

Haven’t done something like that in years...

Xander looked at her...Hopeful...

She looked back...Ok, she admitted...I was hoping you’d ask...

She pulled out a candle and a book...

Shall we?...she smiled, pointing to the living room rug...

***
They formed a circle and watched the flickering candle...

“Lets go...” Joseph said brightly... “We’ve seen everything...”

Just a mo...Spike noted...

Dammit, Angelis...Joseph thought...You...You and your bright ideas...

Buffy and Spike appeared before them...Middle-aged like the others...

“Sorry guys...” Buffy told them...

Had to have one more run before we called it quits...

But we’re together...Don’t fret for us...

“Well...” Spike smiled at Joseph...

We can go now...

***
Ummn...Joseph twisted his hands nervously as he stood looking at Spike...

They were now back safely in the crypt...

“Will you remember all you’ve seen?...” with a rather defeated and resigned air...

Absolutely...Spike grinned...And...

Thanks...

Joseph vanished, muttering...

“Spike?...” Buffy knocked at the crypt door...

Wanta patrol with me?...

Definitely...he hopped up...

“Any more word from war-boy?...” he asked brightly...

She glared...And then...

“He’s marrying some peasant girl down there next week...” she told him...

Indeed...

“Were you alone here...All this time?...” she looked around, guiltily...

Geesch...why didn’t they have you stay at the house?...It’s Christmas Eve...

No problem, he told her...

Well...Why don’t we try and have a nice Christmas?...she looked at him...

It is our first together...she noted shyly...Smiling at him...

It is indeed...he smiled...

“Merry Christmas, Miss Summers...” he bowed...

Mr. Walthrop...she curtsied...

“Did you practice that?...he grinned at her as they headed out...

***
Dawn grinned...BR grinned...Buffy grinned...

Course, I wouldn’t have left you alone in the crypt on Christmas Eve...Dawn grumbled...At least after your redemption...

Poetic license he noted...

“Nice job, honey...” BR told Walthrop...

Though we edit the vamp scenes for our kids in the future, you know...she noted...

Joycee?...Dawn grinned...

Have you guys already settled...?

No, no...BR told her hastily...The floor is still open...

And how come I wasn’t in the story?...BR groused to him...

“You’re there...” he grinned...

After all...


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